As I posted in my last entry, I’ve been reading the blog called Fosterhood in NYC. Last week I stumbled upon it, and after I read a few intriguing and super funny posts, I decided to start at the beginning. Prior to the weekend, I was about a year into Rebecca’s journey into foster parenting. By the weekend, on my agenda, was to find out what happened to her and her the three foster children she’d fostered, and to read through to the end.
I spent most of Saturday night and Sunday night, reading into the wee hours of the morning, to the point I was nodding off and could barely stay awake. But I couldn’t stop reading! So I would change position, wake myself up a bit, and continue on. I finally finished it this morning, and I have to tell you this is one of the best blogs I’ve come across so far. So good in fact, that I debated about finishing it off, because I dreaded now to be caught up, and in a situation where I have to wait for her to post something new.
It’s not that there’s a great shock value, or some positively horrific story line (though it is beyond sad what these children go through), but the thing that got my attention, is her desire to encourage others, specifically younger people to try foster parenting. Then what reeled me in and kept me there, strong belief in advocating for children who otherwise, wouldn’t have a voice, from a place of fierce protection and love.
Rebecca is a hilarious, honest, and outspoken, thirty something, single foster mom, living in New York. She has fostered three children, “Snap”, “Eaglet”, and “Jacket”. (Obviously all names have been changed to protect the children’s privacy.) The first two children were short fosters, but her last one, Jacket, was for over a year. She is still in touch with all the bio families of the children she fostered, and acts as a support not only for the children, but for the mothers of the children as well. She currently is not fostering, though is Godmother to two of her foster children, and still has “Jacket” stay in her home from time to time. She is no longer taking on foster children, but instead is considering adoption.
I know foster parents don’t want to hear that they’re amazing or incredible people, but I’m sorry Rebecca (if you read this), but you are. I admire your determination, devotion and strength. These children are the ones who are the worst off, but I think there is also something to be said for people like you who give their whole heart to their foster children, knowing that the object of foster care, is reunification with the bio parents. I don’t care how much you remind yourself this is the goal, and that this process is all about the child, investing your heart hurts when you have to let go. All three children were very lucky to have been given to you, and Jacket perhaps the luckiest, because you have been given the opportunity to be with her the longest. I know you would probably say you were the lucky one, and that’s a part of what makes you so great.
I don’t want to give anything away, because I’m really hoping this will encourage some people to head over to Fosterhood and check it out themselves. But Rebecca, I just want you to know I’m rooting for permanent reunification of you and Jacket. It would be wonderful if being with her bio mom was the best thing for her, but sadly, it isn’t. She is meant to be with you. I just hope it’s for always and forever.